AltWeeklies Wire
We Score an Exclusive Interview with the Olympic Torchnew
While thousands of San Franciscans were disappointed to miss the Olympic torch relay last week, we managed to catch up with the torch -- or Flame, as the aspiring rapper is known to his friends -- at SFO before getting on the plane for Buenos Aires and listening to Jay-Z on his iPod.
The Ex Gamesnew
For a true journey into the heart of darkness, a columnist tracks down his ex-girlfriends and interviews them about his flaws.
Tags: romantic life, the Infiltrator
The Manly Men of Godnew
No women are allowed into the Promise Keepers, but that didn't stop the Infiltrator from getting on the Prayer Team.
What Part of 'Wait Until Marriage' Don't You Understand?new
A columnist known as the Infiltrator goes to a teen abstinence educators' conference -- and gets laid!
Send in the Clonesnew
Upset that the Koreans are kicking Americans' ass in pet cloning, a writer calls the Bay Area's Genetic Savings and Clone to see about duplicating a cat.
Headbanging for Jesus!new
It's always been a dream of this reporter to get booked on a Christian talk show posing as a guy who fronts a Christian speed-metal band. Thank Jesus -- his prayers were answered.
Aliens, Beware!new
At NASA Space Camp for kids, an adult infiltrator despairs over kids' preparedness to go into space.
Tags: aliens, extraterrestrial
Save the Cute Animals!new
It's time to speak out against the inhumane treatment of animals -- especially the really cute ones. Here's what's hot and what's not in terms of animal rights protests.
Quiz: Are You an Apologist for Michael Jackson?new
Now that Michael Jackson is on trial for child molestation, thousands of his fans have flooded California to voice their support, arguing that the King of Pop is a victim of media manipulation. Take a quiz to determine where you stand on the issue.
Red Road Tripnew
If you follow our travel guide, you'll discover that the residents of Red States are not so scary after all.
Tags: humor & satire
Terminator or Bloviator? Who Is Arnold, Really?new
Some Californians thought Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger's speech at the Republican National Convention was inconsistent with his campaign promises. Take this quiz to see if you're an apologist for the governor.
Could You Be a Scott Peterson Apologist?new
Which of Scott Peterson's actions in the week following his wife Laci's disappearance is most suspicious? Who did it? Take the quiz.
John Kerry's High School Band Tells Allnew
Members of John Kerry's prep-school band, The Electras, tell the story behind their re-released album.
A Guide to Television Coverage of the 2004 Alternolympicsnew
The world's most enhanced athletes will converge on sunny Burlingame, Calif., for the summer's real sports spectacular, the Alternolympics. Not for them the pomp, bloat, suspicion, and urinalysis of the Athens Games.
