All You Wanted to Know About Mackin'

Columbus Alive | September 29, 2005
The fine print on the back of The Mack Within: The Holy Book of Game (Riverhead Freestyle) indicates that it should be shelved under self-help, but perhaps that’s because most bookstores lack a “self-hurt” section.

Really, there’s just something horribly depressing about author Tariq “King Flex” Nasheed’s idiot’s guide to macking, from its back cover come-on of “Are you tired of waiting until you become a successful rapper or athlete before you can get the type of woman you really want?” to its big type font to its broad stereotyping and mild misogyny (the me-first rhetoric sounds sort of like a hip-hop version of Anton LaVey or Ayn Rand).

But taken with a gigantic grain of salt, The Mack Within can make for a pretty fun read (at the end, Flex admits that some of it’s meant to be funny). Basically, there are two types of men in the world, macks and tricks. And you want to be a mack.

Hell, this stuff is in the Bible: As Flex breaks it down, if Adam wasn’t so coochie-whipped by Eve and wore the fig leaf in the relationship, the Book of Genesis would have turned out better for humanity.

If Adam is the most famous trick (cavemen, Ben Affleck and Will Smith fall into the same category), famous macks through history include the ancient Egyptians, lions, Charlie from Charlie’s Angels, Bill Clinton and Jermaine Dupri (you have to be a mack to be that short and score Janet Jackson).

It probably doesn’t hurt to read Flex’s advice, but for God’s sake, be careful taking it—you’re more likely to get slapped across the face than you are to get a Janet. Or maybe that's my inner "square"—a nine-to-fiver outside "the game"—talking; after all, Flex's most salient advice is one of self-confidence. If you accept your own mack status, others will too.

Columbus Alive

Founded in 1983, Alive is the Capital City's oldest and only independent alternative and is known for providing a forum for the area's free thinkers. The paper's spirited and original perspective on music, arts and culture distinguish it from the...
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